The Last Mistress: Um, Yum

I just saw The Last Mistress.

Two things:


Oh yeah, and it was a damn good movie. I really like Catherine Breillat, the director. Watch it.

Internet Goddesses and Gods

Every time I click through to my Google feed reader, I end up browsing the internet for hours and hours on end. It is an inevitable fact of my life. Not only are all the essays and journals and stories and pictures on all the blogs I read interesting in and of themselves, they all link to other equally interesting essays, articles, sites, photos, and whatever. It's a never-ending link cycle.

I love this about blogs.

And it drives me crazy. I want to keep up with all the blogs I like. I really do. It's so hard, though, when I know that even just clicking the mouse that one little time will cause me to spend the next few hours of my life staring at a computer screen. It's always fun and fruitful, but I also always have other things that real life tells me I should be doing.

Then there are the Mega Blogs. You know, those blogs that always seem to be linking to something new and interesting. Yes, if I click on my reader at all, I'll end up on the internet forever. There are certain blogs, though, which I know will distract me even more. Eat the entire day if I let them. There's always tons of good stuff on these blogs. You must know a few like this. The authors seem to be on top of everything that happens in cyberland and they're always finding awesome sites to link to and talk about. They debate topics that are current in the blogosphere. They comment on everyone's blogs.

I am in total awe of these people. Audacia Ray. Violet Blue. Amber Rhea. Viviane. Renegade Evolution. And yeah, all those people are a bit specific to the sex blog-o-sphere and feminism and the like, but hey, it's me. What do you expect?

I wish I were able to as on top of the internet shit as they are. I can barely even manage to blog as often as I do. There's too much online and in the real world. I have no idea how to spread out my attention and get everything done that I want to.


I turned 21 a couple of days ago. I had an absolutely lovely brunch (with mimosas) and dinner with my parents. They splurged on this amazing meal, which was like being in mouth heaven. Oral sex, except not the usual way. Then I went out and did the bar crawl thing, which was fun but not that exciting since it's not like I haven't done it before. Overall, though, I'd say it was one of my best birthdays ever.

It's funny, during life events like that. I only get to turn 21 once, so I'm trying to pay close attention to everything so I can record the experience in my memory. It seems so fleeting, and I want it to last in some way. I think that's one reason I like writing so much. It's a way for me to preserve my life, to draw it out and get as much out of it as I can. Yeah, I only get to live each experience once, but I can rethink them and relearn from them and relive them a little through my writing.

One other nice thing that happened on my birthday was that I ran into a Sister of Perpetual Indulgence. If you don't know who they are, click through and learn about them. They're awesome.

She was one of the only female Sisters, and she carried around a special pot of glitter with, as she put it, "a few special dead people" and some Burning Man soil and other special things in it. She did this little blessing for me in honor of my birthday and glittered me, and it was lovely.

I've been feeling lately like I'm in the thick (you know, slogging molasses thick) of coming of age. I'm right on the cusp of this weird thing, being an adult. I know in a lot of ways I already am an adult, but over the course of this summer I've really started to feel it. It's an odd thing.

People have started to treat me differently; other adults approach me as an equal, not a subordinate. I've started to have different relationships with my parents and people their age. It isn't so much that they're my elders and I must listen to them. It's become a question of respect and trying, on my own, to learn from them. A mentoring relationship more than a parenting one.

I feel a little alone in this transition, though. I don't have any kind of larger community of adults to welcome me into their folds. My closest friends are young; I still haven't successfully jumped the generation gap. I can see now how a faith community would be nice. All those rituals--Bar Mitzvahs, Confirmation, Menarche, whatever--to welcome new adults are really helpful, although they happen a little young. I'm not a spiritual person, but I've been feeling a lack of ritual in my life. Not all rituals have to be spiritual, they can just be about life.

I think I'm going to find a way to create my own ritual. When I'm back at school and surrounded by my loved ones, my chosen family, I want to celebrate adulthood in some way. Anyone have any glowing ideas for adulthood rituals? I feel like the more community input I have, the better.
On living, loving, learning, and fucking with the materials I've got at hand.

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